Introduction

I was also growing to be heavier than I was when I first started this journey, a year ago. My clothes were tight. I didn't want to go up a size... There's a kind of pride involved in not allowing myself to go up a size.

There got to be a point when I'd have to... so I decided that things would have to change around here.

In true wyrd fashion, the right book came to my attention at the right time. I found myself reading The Carbohdrate Addict's Diet and nodding my head and hearing little bells go off here there and everywhere. It explains that some people are simply addicted to carbs... not in a conscious sense, which many people will joke to you about, but because there is a chemical imbalance in your body. Eating carbs triggers off the wrong response in your body, so that even after you've eaten you feel hungry or feel an urge to eat more, and more... and me, snacking all day, well, let's just say that it made a lot of sense.

These are the books:

Welcome to the journey...

April 2000

I took the plunge today. I don't know if it's real, or not. It feels sort of too good to be true. But I'm trying it.

I weigh 180 lbs. That's too much. I'm not that weight in my head. So, just gotta match the imbalance.

I get to eat three decent meals a day. Two are either carb-free or very low on carbs. I wonder about not eating bread, but that's the thing: you get to have anything you want at the third meal, because the two other meals balance you out and you'll lose weight.

We'll see.

11 April 2000

Hey! It worked. This diet is the antithesis of any other diet I've ever been on. I get to eat! Big portions, not mingey ones. And I feel satisfied. It's great!

What amazes me is that I haven't felt any urge to snack at all... not even once! I get to eat great stuff like bacon and eggs, and in the evening I get to have something carb-laden and even more scrummy.

Things are changing. I cook because it's much more of an effort to think of what to eat. So I find myself doing more housework as well, while stuff cooks. I can't believe a fried breakfast can help me lose weight. But hey, it seems to. I'm 2lbs down on last week. Woo-hoo!

This is a hard one to explain to people. One person suggested that we snack because we haven't anything more positive to do. That's just not true. It comes from a failure to understand that sometimes our bodies rebel against us and we can't help it. That's hard for folks to understand. I've had more than my share of thoughts on it... am I kidding myself? But I feel so good so quickly that those doubts are fading already.

It's supposed to be okay to make comments that blame a fat person for their weight. But it isn't okay. It's just ignorance and a failure to be able to walk in another's shoes... or years of having that ignorance rammed down your own throat. We're all different. It isn't anything to do with willpower if your body rebels against the things you eat.

Another said, "Aren't we all?" when I noted I was a carbohdrate addict (I'm not entirely comfortable with the idea, actually. A little embarrassed about it, if the truth be known.) But at least, to this, I got to say, "Nope, we're not."

Went to a party: that was a real challenge. Couldn't drink more than one beer, with a meal... had to avoid all the nibbles. It takes a fair amount of planning, this diet, and scheming to make sure I get food when I need it. I'll get used to it.

18 April 2000

I don't miss bread as much as I thought. I think it's the cooking. I just eat other stuff. Sometimes I miss a quick and easy meal but then, I could just cook up a batch and have some stuff frozen. I've learnt the list of okay veges - not being able to eat carrots came as a surprise - and don't have to keep referring to stuff. It's nice to not have to measure, as well.

25 April 2000

This diet doesn't involve counting portions and calories, but it does involve thought and care. I didn't lose any weight this week, overall, but that doesn't matter. I didn't put any on, either.

I weigh 176.5 lbs and my clothes are feeling a tad looser already.

May

02 May 2000

I found the Web site associated with this diet, and found out that since the book was written, another one had effectively replaced it, including new information and new discoveries. It also pointed out that a frequent error of beginners was to think that the carb-rich meal was a pigout. It can be a pigout once in a while, but mostly it's supposed to be a balanced, normal sized meal with treats. Guess what I did "wrong"?

I also made some of the low-carb muffins. I was a bit suspicious of making something with cottage cheese, which I've hated for ages, but I found out that the muffins were quite nice. The cottage cheese also mixes in fairly nicely with scrambled eggs. It's a good job I like eggs.

09 May 2000

23rd May 2000

Basically, I've been moderating the binges. Actually, they are self-moderated, because as I lose weight and eat less I feel less hungry so I eat less in the day, and also I get full quicker. Your stomach shrinks - ahh, how wonderful the human body!

The looseness of my clothes continues, and I'm glad of it, particularly since it is getting so hot now.

So, nearly a pound down. I had a chat with some friends and not only is one of the people a strong advocate of this diet, having had success with it, they all understand my position. The support is nice. I am still slightly embarrassed to admit to any kind of an eating problem. But you can't argue with results...

October 2000

Sometime in the Summer, I got way off plan. I am now heavier. I don't want to tell you how much heavier. I think that it is time for me to rethink. I can feel that shifting in my mind which indicates I will be ready again. But I don't want to write about it here, not at this stage, because I have to figure out in my own mind why it went so wrong.

When there is something to write, I will write it. I am sorry if this has disappointed you. A bunch of extremely high stress things happened this Summer, but that isn't the whole of why I let it drop by the wayside. It's a mindset sort of a thing. I actually really do think this way of eating works for me. It just has to be a case of my being motivated to do it properly.

And in time, things will work out :-)